This post was also shared on my personal blog: 2 Penny Blog.
Ten years ago on the early morning of Sunday, February 28, 2016, I learned about the shooting of three Prince William County Police Officers as I prepared to head to my church (at the time in Mechanicsville, Virginia). One of the officers, Officer Guindon, had died from her wounds – just a day after becoming an officer.
Now, I had friends who worked with that department, and at times when an officer in Alexandria, I had served alongside Prince William police in training or some other task. Yet, I did not know her or those wounded. Still, the shootings angered me, and her death impacted me with surprising emotion and connection; bringing a sense of loss and memories of past, similar trauma.
There are reasons thousands of officers travel far, sometimes at their own expense, to honor fallen officers. Certainly, it displays solidarity and respect for the fallen. It’s meant to be a concrete sign of support to the family and department members in deep grief. A large crowd can help proclaim the message that the deceased’s life mattered and continues to matter. Much as the National Police Memorial indicates through its inscriptions, they will be honored, not for the way they died, but for how they lived.
As one police ministry in Texas notes on its webpage, “The job is referred to as having ‘a mystique veiled by a sacred canopy.’ The symbolism, pageantry and tradition make our calling noble.” And certainly, the “final radio call” and the playing of bagpipes serve to honor the officer’s dedication to service, but they also serve as a profound expression of grief fostering an emotional connection between those presents and speaking memories of other people and places gone but still carried in one’s heart. Vincent E. Henry correctly notes in his book, Death Work: Police, Trauma, and the Psychology of Survival (2004), that these events force officers to confront their own mortality. Funerals act as a necessary, though painful, part of the process for the survivors. There always exists the psychological reality that it could have been you or someone you know and love.
At the time of Officer Guindon’s death, I suspect that many people sensed the added “wrong” of her just starting her job with hope and celebration only to die the next day. As with infant or child deaths, such unexpected, sudden officer deaths can become personalized. Thus, they can become more intense if not traumatic. As suggested in literature about grief such as The Burden of Loss: Unexpected loss of a loved one and psychiatric disorder across the life course in a national study (2015), unexpected losses can make processing grief more difficult. The proximity of death emotionally or identity can cause very real complications for some. At the same time, I would remind the reader that we never fully “deal” with the grief of those we feel connected too. Anniversaries or other reminders can make us grieve anew. Indeed, it’s important to say that no one person grieves the same way.
So, I suppose that’s the fuller context of Prince William County’s Facebook post this morning. Departments promise to “never forget.” There are certainly members of the department still working who knew her personally and remember the trauma and loss of that day as if yesterday. Based on comments, you can see how people in and outside the department are touched by personal grief. Such deaths tend to stick with you.
The below essay was written in haste before heading out my door that morning. It wasn’t masterful. It won’t win a prize for literature. Yet it was my real time response echoing what I wrote about above. I’m reposting it in her honor but also for other colleagues of mine who have been murdered or died by suicide. May they all rest in peace, and may our love for one another, sacred memories shared, and God’s grace bring ongoing healing and hope until (as I believe) Jesus returns to wipe away all tears (Rev. 21:4).
God bless Officer Guindon’s mother, and all those who continue to grieve. Please join me in praying for our officers, deputies and their families each day.
My original post follows:
I’m thinking a lot this morning about my first shift, my first arrest, and the many men and women who helped me have a great (if relatively short) law enforcement career. They actually helped me become who I am today, and so I always give God thanks for them and my experiences. It is why I volunteer as a police chaplain today – to try to give back.
And yet, I’m also recalling the joy my family felt having just seen me graduate from the police academy, and then on that same weekend, seeing their fear as I headed out to my first midnight shift. I also remember with love coworkers injured and killed as a result of their desire to serve others. Thus, Officer Guindon’s death is somehow personal to me, as with every law enforcement death. I can’t help it. I feel like a piece of me has died, although I know it doesn’t make much sense to many.
How many Officer Guindon’s are out there? How many such families sacrifice, live in fear, or are now grieving across our country? How must her Field Training Officer and fellow officers feel as this recruit died and as they try to make sense of it? They all need our active support and prayer.
And yet, I don’t know how to pray for this. She was on her first shift, and the hope of last Friday has turned into community shock and grief spreading across the Thin Blue Line. I remain at a loss for words, especially as law enforcement officers in our country continue to be so quickly and openly hated, condemned and needlessly die. And so, I find comfort in these words. “But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words.” (Romans 8:25-26).
To my brothers and sisters still fighting the fight, you are not alone. God has not forgotten you. God will make good come from this evil, although we do not yet know how. No life dedicated to the service and love of neighbor is a wasted one, no matter how short. I remain in communion with you, and you will all be with me at worship this morning in my heavy but hopeful heart.
The Rev. Louis Florio is a former member of the City of Alexandria Police Department and current volunteer law enforcement chaplain with Hanover County Sheriff’s Office and the City of Fredericksburg’s Police Department. This post may be shared freely with proper attribution.
(C) 2026 The Rev. Louis Florio. All content not held under another’s copyright may not be used without permission of the author. Scripture passages when used are from the NRSVue translation unless otherwise indicated.
Like many in the Washington Metro area and beyond, I was shocked and saddened by the collision last night of American Airlines Flight 5432 with a United States Helicopter from Fort Belvoir. I wanted to share a prayer with my congregation, so I scouted around my denominations website and others. Nothing fit quite right, but inspired by the words of others (and hopefully the Holy Spirit who prays for us when we don’t have the words), I came up with this. Feel free to adapt it to your future needs as a chaplain or individual:
Gracious God, we pray for all the victims and their families involved in the crash of American Airlines Flight 5432 with a military helicopter in Washington, DC this evening. Grant survivors, families that grieve, and those awaiting word comfort during this time of trial. Grant them peace of mind, solace, and a confident heart that you are always there in every crisis of life. Embolden first responders and all those serving on scene to work fearlessly and to the best of their ability and training in their attempts to save lives. Grant them safety and encourage their families as they await their loved one’s return. Bless medical professionals and communication officers to perform their duties well guided by your Sprit. Wrap your loving, tender arms around all those impacted during this fearful time. Amen.
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE
Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast, we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
You can listen to the below blog post on Spotify or other providers.
“My head hurts from being pummeled repeatedly with rocks. My arms and torso ache from taking direct hits from water bottles flung at us. My shin hurts from a tear gas canister that someone threw back at us. My back hurts from having to wear riot gear for 7 hours on top of my normal 30 extra pounds of gear. I vomited for 10 minutes into a toilet when I got home this morning. My sense of dignity is hurt by the unspeakable things that were said to my brothers and sisters in blue who happen to be black. My sense of family is hurt by the unspeakable things that were said to us about our own children, parents, and siblings. And my heart breaks for the city that I love. I know my city is hurting right now. I know people are angry and want answers. But there’s only one way we can move forward together, right now: love. Lots and lots of love. Connect. Respect. Protect. And Love. Time to go keep the peace.” – Ofc. Brad Philip, Public Facebook Post, 9/21/16
As time passes, physical wounds might heal, but emotional wounds and bad memories can remain. I came across the above post recently in a Facebook memory, and indeed, it brought back a lot of memories. This was one of several difficult times for law enforcement over the past decade or so. Those whom we wish to serve can reject us harshly and unfairly at times. So, I very much admire this officer’s wisdom and insight in the face of adversity. We cannot undo bad things with more bad actions. As part of the law enforcement culture, we might not use the word often enough, but love is the only way forward.
In the Jewish tradition, there is a concept called hesed. The Hebrew word hesed simply means loving-kindness. The use of this word incorporates kindness, mercy, and steadfast love as mentioned in the Hebrew scriptures. When humans share hesed, they are reflecting the Divine Being’s nature (or the more secular might argue, an ultimate value). We are offering love for love’s sake. It is not about someone deserving it. It is not romantic love, but it is a kind of deep, connecting love, nonetheless. It recognizes the intrinsic sanctity of all life. It is love offered in action for others as a redeemer and protector.[i]
In any relationship, we can never make someone love us or treat us well. All that we can do is take ownership of our own actions. As our siblings in Twelve Step programs discover, we only have power to clean up our side of the street.[ii] In seeking to love others, even our enemies, we can help accomplish what other scriptures from varied religions and spiritual philosophies argue using varied words. We can help ultimately defeat evil with good. People of goodwill tend to see such love in others and respond, but traditional enemies and bad actors sometimes do as well. It can disarm angry people who want to have an excuse (perhaps any excuse) to get angrier. Such love can transform people. It might transform yourself. This likely seems counter intuitive, but it works. I experienced this in my own time as a police officer, and I thank my FTO for demonstrating this kind of behavior for me to learn from and be inspired by.
“Connect. Respect. Protect. And Love.”[iii] I would argue that’s part of the attitude of hesed too. Hesed is slow and hard work. Yet when we live up to our call as law enforcement, this is the ultimate value we represent. Through seeking to represent such a love – as best as you understand it – in what can prove an unloving world, I think you will find that you won’t just be keeping the peace. Your faithful service will be helping create peace in the world and within yourself.
That’s it for this time. Stay safe, seek to do some good, and I hope to see you again soon.
[i] See HarperCollins Bible Dictionary. (1996). Achtemeir, P.J., General Editor. “Loving-kindness,” Gammie, J.G. San Francisco: Harper Collins. p. 627-628.
[ii]Alcoholics Anonymous. (1990). New York: Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., p. 77-78.
[iii] Ofc. Brad Philip, public Facebook post, 2016.
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE
Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast, we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
Original photo by Tim Mossholder on unsplash.com. Used by permission.
I don’t usually post my sermons on this podcast, but I think this particular sermon will resonate with many working in any field related to first responders. I look at the commands for sabbath rest found in scripture in light of my own experience as a police officer in the late 1980s through mid-90s. This subject of sabbath rest is a common value that often crisscrosses the spectrum of religious faiths and secular philosophies. Rest is critical! Whether you think the story of God’s commandments is divine inspiration or just an ancient wisdom tale, I think you will find something to help orient you in your work and restore your spirit. If you would like to hear more on the subject of rest, listen to the special crossover episode (S1, E7) “Self-Care and Sabbath Rest.”
If and when someone mentions the word “sabbath,” what comes to mind? Often, people think about coming to church for services, or restful activities (like golf or fishing, taking a nap), or family activities and dinners. That can all be part of sabbath practices, but there’s a lot more implied by that little biblical word. Over the next three weeks, the Narrative Lectionary asks us to take a break and reflect upon what sabbath is, why God commanded it, and how are we can rightly observe it.
Now, you might recall that the Ten Commandments or Ten Sayings of God in Hebrew are mentioned explicitly in the Jewish scriptures (our Old Testament) only three times (once in Exodus and twice in Deuteronomy). Yet, they remain key to all that comes afterward…key to who the newly freed Israelites are to become…even foundational to what Jesus will teach. Recall that these Twelve Tribes of Israel have survived the horrors and burdens of slavery, and they have come out wounded. They don’t have a good idea of who they are as a people or of their purpose. They are prone to selfishness and infighting. They might be easily influenced by the world around them. So, God provides Moses and his people a structure for their lives. Through these sayings, God commands that they love God, but also commands the love of family, and love of community. These commands are meant to help us love as God loves.
You might also know that some suggest that there are 613 other commandments (or mitzvot) found in the Jewish scriptures (people can count differently), but “the Ten” are the only ones that come directly from God. And all those other dietary laws, and laws about appearance, worship, and civil law relate to the ten – come out of them…are meant to magnify them, The Laws of Moses are all meant (as strange as they might sound to our modern ears) to help Israelites love and worship God and love the neighbor as oneself. As my professor Dr. Dean McBride argued, the Ten Commandments serve as a polity for the Israelites (a kind of constitution), so that they can become kodesh olam, a holy people set apart, the Holy People of God.
So isn’t it interesting that among these ten sayings, we find the command to take a sabbath…to stop doing and just be. Yet “sabbath” isn’t just about you. You are to give a sabbath to your family, your workers, any slaves, even your animals. Isn’t that curious? To become who they are called to be, meant to be, the Israelites are told to promote rest. Much as God ceased work on the seventh day of creation, they are to cease all their work. Yet as a people that has been formally forced to work sometimes seven days a week in Egypt as slaves, God indicates that this practice isn’t just about remembering the creation of the world. God says, “Remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt, and the Lord your God brought you out from there with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm.” The sabbath is a day to cease work but also a day to embody and remember our faith that God has saved us and loves us. God will provide. So, we can relax.
And so over time, the idea of going to the Temple, or synagogue, or eventually Christian church became intimately connected to the concept of “sabbath.” In community, we can hear of God’s glory, share in community life, and offer worship and praise. Yet it seems that it wasn’t always this way. Some scholars think that the destruction of Temple of Jerusalem and Babylonian Exile gave rise to synagogues sometime after 597 BC. Before that, the Temple, and before that the Tent of Meeting would have priestly activities conducted on the Sabbath, but there was no expectation of the average person’s presence. Primarily, most people just ceased all work. As time passed in the face of persecution, wars, and exile…as the People of God continued to separate themselves from the pagan practices of those around them, they discovered how helpful corporate worship could be in facilitating the people’s understanding of their identities and call. By Jesus’ time, there were pious people who would gather on the Sabbath to sing hymns, listen to scripture, and hear Rabbi’s (or “teachers”) apply the scriptures to one’s daily life. This is much as we do today, and much as faithful Jews do today.
Rest and remember, those are two keys to becoming more of who we were created and meant to be. Certainly, our insurance companies have finally taken notice at some level. All these centuries later, in the Federal government and businesses, one will hear about wellness wheels where we are encouraged to see to the needs of not only our physical body, but also our mental, emotional, and even spiritual selves. As humans, we might understand spirituality differently (that openness to the idea that we are part of something greater than ourselves), but somehow these parts of who we are all interact. They are all connected in our make-up. Yes, the ancient practices of Sabbath helped the Israelites perform better, be better, and grow individually and in community, as much as the practice can help us do so today.
For example, when I was a young police officer working countless hours on midnight shift, volunteering to serve at other times for extra pay, chasing after promotion, without recognizing it, I was running myself ragged. Add to that a toxic mix of trauma and constant stress (basically life – we all experience stress), and I ended up in crisis. My relationships were suffering as were aspects of my health. Then with the help of friends who saw my suffering as well as God’s help (I would argue), I sought to reorient my life toward a more scriptural understanding. I continued to seek to care for others but now also myself. I came to a new understanding that caring for myself was not selfish if done in order to love God and neighbor better. Indeed, I was reminded that God’s commands can be summarized by this, “Loving God with our whole body, heart, and soul (all that we are), and loving our neighbor as ourselves”…That is “AS ourselves,” not better than ourselves.
Because God loves us, within his commands, we discover a healthy love of self can promote love of God and others…It can enrich our lives! And in my case, as a Sergeant pointed out to me without knowing any of my efforts during an annual review that first year, he began to see me perform better and become more patient and kinder. I also found that I handled stress better. Even at some life and death moments, I found that I thought more clearly and discerned more options for how I could respond to the world. I discovered that I became more resilient.
Rest and remember. That’s good advice, for as humans we can easily fall into survival mode. We can find ourselves far from the abundant life Jesus promised. We can burn out rather than burn brightly with the love of Christ. Some might stop superficially at the command to rest and remember never going deeper. Many might become legalistic about it. Others might even become rigid and busy in how they play and vacation – doing, doing, doing. Yet Jesus taught there is more going on here. He told the rabbis of his time that the Sabbath Day was created for us as a blessing. It is not about you being a bad person because your butt is not in a pew every time the door is open. It isn’t just about sleep or vacation. Sure, these things need to be prioritized at times…taken seriously…but we are not given the gift of life for the sake of sabbath. The sabbath is a gift given us so that we can discover a more abundant life.
As an article I read recently suggests, some might judge you harshly for not being at Church.[i] It is true that you might be hurting yourself and in your absence be hurting others who need your presence. They might need your witness of faith, or even just a kind word in passing from you. Yet there are times that our call to be family or serve in the world might also take precedence. And so, the Church has historically discerned that if you cannot be present or have to work or volunteer on any Sunday, be sure to take another Sabbath Day.
Indeed, as early Christians were thrown out of the synagogues and persecuted, our Sabbath Day moved from the Jewish practice of Saturday to Sunday, the day we remember Christ’s resurrection for our sake. So, sabbath is not exclusively about one special day in the week whether Saturday or Sunday. It is not solely about worship.
Again, there’s more going on here. Bonnie Gray, who writes a lot on sabbath rest, argues, “Jesus’ response to our lack of rest is shockingly opposite of these condemning voices.” Jesus taught, “Come to me, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you” …and you will find the rest your souls hunger for. Not surprisingly, God’s heart for us and our need for rest goes deeper than we ourselves can obtain on our own. Even for sabbath, we need God’s help – God’s grace. True sabbath, Bonnie Gray argues, is returning to who God created us to be. Accepted and beloved just as we are.”[ii]
Yes, she goes on, rest contains emotional honesty. We are not gods. We need forgiveness. We need food for our journey. We need to hear of God’s love for us. Rest means that we won’t allow a world that shouts at us, “Do more! Be perfect! Work harder!” to define us. Only God’s love ultimately defines us, and God says it is not only ok, but it can be good to rest. It is important to stop and remember that we are loved, need to share love, and need to be loved. And so there is a relational component to rest. Just as Jesus ate and laughed with his disciples, just as he encouraged their vulnerability to one another and to God, we come to understand that rest is an experience of being known. It is good to have people who you can just be your imperfect self with. In seeking holy, purposeful rest, she says that we resist the noise around us, and we grow still to know God better and listen to God’s whispers.
As much as God fed and cared for Elijah when he was at his physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual limit, God seeks to bless us through rest. Our intimacy with and healthy dependance upon God will grow from the process of rest. And like all of creation that rests in the love of God, as the prophet Isaiah pointed out, we too will break forth into shouts of joy (Isa. 14:7). In closing, Bonnie Gray suggests that rest is giving yourself grace “to receive all the good, instead of letting in the guilt.” “Move as God prompts you,” she urges, “inspired by [God’s] goodness, rather than fear or guilt.” And I would add, rather than from any selfish motivations.
Surrounded by crowds needing forgiveness and healing, with the weight of the world’s salvation on his shoulders, it is important for us to notice that Jesus would break away to pray in the mountains or spend time with those whom he loved. Jesus would go to the Synagogue for the gift of communal worship. Jesus would sleep or allow angels or others to minister to him. Jesus in human form – as busy as he was, as important as his mission was – knew he needed sabbath rest. So, why are we so prideful to deny our own need? Yes, Holy Wisdom proclaims, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens” (Ecc. 3:1). This includes sabbath…It includes holy rest. Jesus proclaimed that he came that those he loves may have life and have it abundantly. Taking on his yoke, receiving the gift of abundant life, includes taking on his many practices of sabbath rest – not as obligation, but as a means of grace. God commanded sabbath because God knows our needs as created creatures and loves us. Amen.
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE: Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
The Footwashing Series #2: Justice, by Salt + Gold
On February 1, 2023, I had the opportunity to present at the Virginia Synod (ELCA’s) Midwinter Power in the Spirit. The theme of the online event was “Blessed are…” – a three evening examination of the Beatitudes. For my part, I was asked to speak to a group of Virginia Lutherans, the majority who had no law enforcement experience, about “Blessed are the Peacemakers.”
Using the extreme experience of law enforcement as a lens, I hoped to help people better understand the complexity, sacrifice and blessing of trying to be a peacemaker in our modern world. With this audience, the presentation was explicitly Christian, but it draws upon sociology and other fields of inquiry. You will likely hear something to challenge the understanding of your experience or affirm it in a helpful way. As always, you are invited to keep the conversation going. Please share this presentation or email me with any comments or questions. A video version of this presentation will be released by the Virginia Synod soon, and I will add the link here. You can learn more about the Virginia Synod at vasynod.org.
To listen to my presentation through my podcast, visit: Midnights LEO on Anchor or your favorite podcast provider.
You can also watch an edited, video version provided by the Virginia Synod (ELCA):
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE: Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
My valued friend and colleague, Fr. Ethan Lowery, hosts an on-going conversation with friends about rest, sabbath, and resisting the overbearing cultural pressure to work/produce/be available all the time. He shares these conversations through a podcast primarily aimed at young adults called Non-Working Title.
Although originally intended for the young adults whom he serves, this episode’s discussion will likely be very relatable and helpful to first responders. Topics covered in this crossover episode include: trauma, secondary trauma, family systems, addiction, sleep issues, and more. This episode will echo some topics and illustrations mentioned in “Self-Care when helping others” (S1, E7), but it is much more conversational, personal, and expansive. I offer my thanks to Fr. Ethan for his allowing me to share this edited version of my interview here.
For those that don’t know him, Fr. Ethan Lowery (he/him) is an Episcopal Priest and young adult and campus missioner here locally in Fredericksburg, VA. He shares often that his interest in young adult ministry is rooted in being a young adult and having experienced himself the Church not always knowing what to do with 20- and 30-somethings. You can learn more at The House FXBG.
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE: Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
This episode incorporates an approximately forty minute class offered to members of the Hanover County (Virginia) Sheriff’s Office with permission. Chaplain program participants and support staff were the primary audience, yet as Captain Terry Sullivan states in the introduction, the self care principals apply across the helping vocations, especially law enforcment officers. The class was recorded live on December 2, 2022. You can find the recording at my anchor.fm site or on other podcast providers: CLICK HERE.
Please note as stated in the introduction, that a few of of my case studies or experiences were edited out for the sake of privacy. For example, as you join the class, the first example (edited in part) compares the experience of a stalker to how we might address the personification of other threats experienced by all of us at times. (You will note a gap and transition in the conversation from the intro to asking for ideas on how to respond to the scneario.)
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE
Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast, we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
Chaplain Lou Florio at the 20th anniversary remembrance ceremony for the City of Fredericksburg in 2021
In 2021, I was honored as the local police chaplain to be asked to provide the invocation for the City of Fredericksburg’s 20th Anniversary 9-11 Memorial. The text of my prayer follows:
“Creator and sustainer of all that is or will ever be, look into our hearts and hear our hidden prayers of lament and hope. We gather this day to mark the horrific loss of life at Shanksville, Pennsylvania, the Pentagon, and in New York City. Twenty years have passed, but when we think of that day and the wars that followed, we find that wounds, grief, and anger often remain in our hearts. They have sadly become part of who we are. Yet, we were not created for or are we ultimately defined by such sin and suffering. We were made for life. And so, as we reflect on that day long ago, we also recall our fellow citizens who rose up from the ashes to love their neighbor, to serve, protect and bless. Through small kindnesses and heroic deeds, we made it through, and we walked on together to make it to this day. Many challenges still confront us. Fears threaten our peace. Misunderstandings can separate us. Yet that day long ago still has the power to teach and encourage us. Love matters, and when we trust that it does, death will never have the final word. As we gather this day and in any days that follow, bless us with the wisdom of the elders who came before us that we might see in our neighbors ourselves…that we might learn the truth that we are all relatives. It is you who calls us to love, serve and forgive one another. You call us to new life and beginnings. Through this time together, comfort, encourage and strengthen us for our journey ahead – a journey you ask us to walk together as one with you. Amen.”
As another 9-11 remembrance comes around, feel free to use it or adapt it if you find it helpful or meaningful in any way. Never forget. May the Lord help us to heal, forgive, and reconcile as God’s children.
You can listen to the above post on its accompanying podcast on anchor or on other providers.
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE
Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast, we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
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In a previous blogpost and podcast, Season 1, Episode 3, I first tried to unpack the unhealthy relationship between cynicism and police culture. As I noted, one will hear officers often claim cynicism keeps them safer, but an incredible amount of research and my personal experience does not support this. Indeed, when cynicism takes hold within us, we tend to separate from others and isolate. We can often descend further toward burnout or worse. This condition reflects our broken, difficult interactions within an imperfect world. Cynicism is an unhealthy response where we ultimately hurt ourselves or others – often unintentionally. I often in gest call this process sin-icism. (Sin is often defined as a violation against religious law, but it also can be an action considered highly reprehensible or reflective of a serious fault.[i] For our use here, it need not be religious in nature.)
Don’t believe that cynicism can hurt if not kill? Well, just Google the words “cynicism,” “health,” and “police” sometime. People with high levels of cynical distrust may be more likely to develop dementia.[ii] And some researchers even suggest that pessimism and cynicism can negatively impact heart health.[iii] From these many studies, you will also discover that there is a suggested linkage between poor health and cynicism. Cynicism might tend to promote ill health, and ill health might promote cynicism. These conditions tend to worsen one another.[iv] And if you know street cops, you know that they often suffer from chronic pain, obesity, stress conditions and more as they become veterans and prepare to retire. Their ill health can promote cynicism, and it is likely a symptom of or connected to something deeper going on inside them. Their woundedness from years on the beat, poor selfcare, and unhealthy, quick meals on the go starts to take its tole on the physical and emotional components of the self. It warps their outlook about others and the world in a way that does not reflect reality. And with cynicism growing, they often can find their isolation from others increasing. It is self-perpetuating, and yet because cynicism is catchy, cynical people tend to find one another to reenforce their negative and faulty views.
One early FBI Bulletin on the topic was titled, Police Cynicism – A Cancer in Law Enforcement. The author argued, “The inherent stress and frustration found in the law enforcement profession provides an ideal breeding ground for the disorder.”[v] Basically, as social beings, we are influenced by both our experiences and those around us. As a police recruit, you might enter the field of law enforcement ready to help others, but soon you encounter a disproportionate number of people who are inhumane to one another. You meet people who wish to deceive you if not hurt you. And the violence you interact with over time can leave its imprint on your soul. You might experience moral injuries,[vi] or you might experience a form of compassion fatigue.[vii] Then add to this mix seasoned officers who, as they associate with you, tell stories of their disappointments and travail. In doing so, as you begin to identify your own experiences with theirs, they subtly influence your worldview. Administrative issues, pay issues, and more can leave officers not only righlty disgruntled but also quite cynical. And unfortunately, cynicism can spread to infect the entire agency. Variables such as gender, race, and relations in policing might impact this process for good or ill.[viii]
There’s no denying it. The mountain of evidence regardless of one’s vocation indicates cynicism doesn’t help us. It hurts us. It tends to wound the officers, their families, and those whom they swore to serve and protect. Despite what some people might say, no one joins police work to hurt people. Healthy people feel called to this vocation because they want to try to help people. Yet somehow, the job can wear down our idealism into cynicism.
Officers often identify their cynicism as a kind of protection. They claim it helps them be ready for attack, betrayal, or disappointment. It serves as a kind of wall or boundary shielding them from hurt. Yet, what it really does is shield one from deeper and more meaningful relationships. In expecting bad things from people, one might misinterpret and overreact to comments. In anticipating resistance, an officer might become prone to use of force when another approach would work better. As officers struggle to turn off their concerns and worries – ruminating, personalizing, and catastrophizing them – Ellen Kirschman, PhD suggests, “they can develop a kind of tunnel vision, tending to isolate themselves from others and associate only with other cops; therefore, they have a limited reality check on the universe.”[ix] Rather than keep danger out, officers might develop a tendency to keep good out too. Spousal and other family relations can suffer if not die. The resulting isolation and emotional harm might facilitate addiction, extramarital affairs, or promote depression and suicidal thoughts over time. Cynicism kills relationships and sometimes ultimately the cynic.
As I’ve suggested in the previous post, a healthy skepticism is warranted. People can hurt you or break your trust. The world can be dangerous. So, observe and test relationships. Trust someone with something about yourself and see how they do with what you have shared. If they proved trustworthy, trust some more. Do so, over and over again, and if they trust you back with the things they share, intimacy can grow. On calls, practice safety techniques, but don’t obsess about danger. Developing this kind of tunnel vision on a call can result in bad outcomes for you or others. You might miss opportunities to deescalate the situation, or identify solutions to the problems at hand, or even miss a greater danger at hand because of your assumptions. Best of all, the less cynical you are, the more friends…the larger support network…might develop. You will recognize there is still good in the world, and you aren’t alone. You will have others to help walk with you through good times and bad.
In closing, I hope what I’ve shared will open up your mind or the mind of someone you love to the realities of life. Life can be hard, but it can always be good. Why make life and relationships harder for yourself? Why hurt others with your unhealthy attitude or hurt your overall health? In a future episode I will try to offer you some antidotes to the cancer of cynicism. I hope you will come back and join me then. Until next time, stay safe, try to do some good, and I hope to see you again soon.
[vi] “In traumatic or unusually stressful circumstances, people may perpetrate, fail to prevent, or witness events that contradict deeply held moral beliefs and expectations. When someone does something that goes against their beliefs this is often referred to as an act of commission and when they fail to do something in line with their beliefs that is often referred to as an act of omission. Individuals may also experience betrayal from leadership, others in positions of power or peers that can result in adverse outcomes. Moral injury is the distressing psychological, behavioral, social, and sometimes spiritual aftermath of exposure to such events. A moral injury can occur in response to acting or witnessing behaviors that go against an individual’s values and moral beliefs.” Norman, S. PhD and Maguen, S. PhD (ud). Moral Injury. Downloaded fromhttps://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/treat/cooccurring/moral_injury.asp
[vii] “Compassion fatigue is a term that describes the physical, emotional, and psychological impact of helping others — often through experiences of stress or trauma. Compassion fatigue is often mistaken for burnout, which is a cumulative sense of fatigue or dissatisfaction.” See Compassion Fatigue: Symptoms to Look For at https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/signs-compassion-fatigue
[viii] Enciso, G., Maskaly, J., Donner, C.M. (20 March 2017). Organizational cynicism in policing: Examining the development and growth of cynicism among new police recruits [Abstract] in Policing: An International Journal.
[ix] Krischman, E., Ph.D. (2007). I Love a Cop: What Police Families Need to Know (Rev. Ed.). New York: The Guilford Press. p. 32-34.
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE
Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast, we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
Chaplain Lou discusses with author and veteran former police officer, Mark Bergin, his crime novel, Apprehension. Although fiction, the characters and culture of 1980/1990s policing are very realistic. Using the story and personal experience, Chaplain Lou and Mark discuss important self-care issues for law enforcement. To buy his book, search “Apprehension, by Mark Bergin” on your favorite online bookseller’s website. Guest bio: “Mark Bergin spent four years as a newspaper reporter, winning the Virginia Press Association Award for general news reporting, before joining the Alexandria, Virginia, Police Department in 1986. Twice named Police Officer of the Year for narcotics and robbery investigations, he served in most of the posts described in his debut novel APPREHENSION. Kirkus Reviews calls APPREHENSION “compelling,” and says Bergin is a “gritty and authentic new voice in police fiction.” APPREHENSION was a finalist for the 2020 Silver Falchion Award from Killer Nashville. He was also a contributor to the crime anthology The Eviction of Hope, published in 2021. Bergin is a member of Mystery Writers of America, Sisters in Crime, the Virginia Writers Club, and International Thriller Writers. Write him at berginwriter@gmail.com, or Facebook-friend him at Mark Bergin, Writer. He and his wife divide their time between Alexandria, Virginia and Kitty Hawk, North Carolina.”
DISCLAIMER: THIS WEBSITE/PODCAST DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE
Although I have served or do serve as a spiritual counselor, a chaplain, and/or ordained minister, I am not your counselor nor a medical professional. All content on this website and podcast is provided for informational and educational purposes only, does not constitute medical, psychological, or spiritual advice, and does not establish any kind of patient-client or pastor-congregant relationship. Although on this website and podcast, we strive to provide accurate general information, the information found through these posts are not a substitute for any kind of professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this content. Always consult a professional in the area of your particular needs and circumstances prior to making any professional, legal, medical, financial or tax-related decisions. Opinions expressed by the host or guests do not necessarily reflect those of any other person or entity.
Midnights LEO 